Being Here Tonight

This afternoon, I rode the bus back from my teaching job.  The driver – it’s always the same woman – pulled up to my stop, and I pushed open the back doors.  The air was especially brisk as it hit my face.  I had a handful of errands to run by bike with my children today before dinner, so my steps were quick.  The wind picked up behind me, pushing me along.

When I walked in,the house felt a little cozier than usual.  My children, in turtlenecks and wool socks, were gathered around their aunt at the kitchen table.  There were still a few peanut butter cookies left.  As my boys poured forth all the news of their day, I washed my hands.  I let my frozen fingertips linger under the warm water, considering my to do list.  I looked outside, and saw a veil of heavy raindrops spill down from the sky.  A few of them became slush as they hit the window: frozen rain.

On the sofa, the children had installed a down comforter and a stack of picture books.  I imagined a cup of tea there, too.  Hot tea.  I glanced again at the freezing rain on the other side of the window, then to the picture books.  I mentally moved the handful of errands in my appointment calendar for Wednesday afternoon into the Thursday column. 

If you are a parent, then you already know what it is to have a little more on your plate than can be comfortably tucked into.  I hope that you also know the pleasure of putting the to-do list aside from time to time.  In my opinion, one of the unexpected benefits of getting around by bike is that, sometimes, I decide not to do it.

I could have made it work to get out on that errand somehow.  If the errand was really urgent, I could have left my children with the neighbor for a few minutes while I ran around on my bike.  I could have chosen to do the highest priority errand by bus.  I could have made it work to get everyone outside and on the bike had I really needed to.

But none of those options felt quite right.  So I looked at my list, realized that nothing really had to be done right away, and reorganized my calendar a bit.  I fished a cookie out of the jar.  I set the teakettle to boil, and asked my children which books we ought to read first.

As we pulled the comforter around us, the first few flakes of snow found their way out of the clouds.  Perfect. 

I wrote this post on Wednesday evening, but didn't have a chance to proofread and post it until after midnight.  I decided to preserve some language that reflected the original moment at which I wrote this: tonight, this afternoon, etc.

Friday Family on Bikes...Mine

First, an introduction:

I'm Emily.  I work mostly as a stay-at-home parent to Bigger (age 4) and Little (age 2).  I also work one day a week at a rural elementary school as a writing teacher.  Both of these jobs are my dream jobs.  My husband, Austin, is a superhero: he works full-time as a carpenter, and spends his evenings in graduate school studying library and information science.  He is also an amazing husband and papa who makes seriously good waffles.

Austin and the boys

No, my kids are not actually named "Bigger" and "Little".  But this is Eugene, so I understand why you might be curious.

Our family bike setup:

Our family bike setup is currently in transition.  While we are awaiting the arrival of a Workcycles Fr8 Uni this spring, I am riding Austin's hybrid bike with a ragtag circus of kid and cargo attachments: a Bobike Mini front child seat with windscreen (you can get one in Eugene at Arriving by Bike), a Follow Me tandem coupler that allows me to tow Bigger's bike behind mine, and an extra-large milk crate for hauling a limited amount of cargo.

Our new bike will be able to carry two children on seats mounted to the rear rack, as well as one up front on a child saddle.  It will also have a very large, lidded wicker basket up front and panniers on the rear rack.  It will probably tow Bigger's Follow Me tandem, but I haven't entirely made up my mind about that yet.  Installing the Follow Me would allow me to carry four child passengers!

When we got rid of our second car over the summer, I considered a bakfiets or an Xtracycle, but the deal breaker for me was compatibility with the bike racks on buses and trains.  We share a garden on my mother-in-law's 7 acre property in Creswell.  I need to be able to take a bike on the bus to Creswell with me so that I can cycle (instead of walk) the three miles between the bus stop and my mother-in-law's place.  I've also heard stories of folks being denied the opportunity to load larger cargo bikes onto Amtrak trains.  So we're going to see how bus and train friendly the Fr8 can be.  It is a seriously heavy bike.

We love our Follow Me tandem coupler for a number of reasons.  Unlike most tagalong-style bike attachments, the Follow Me allows families to install rear child seats, crates, and virtually anything else on the adult bike.  Once he feels confident enough, I will be able to disconnect Bigger's bike from mine so that he can ride solo on the bike path or quiet streets, and then reattach him when we're heading into car traffic.

While I'm excited about my new bike, I also want to emphasize that it's not necessary to purchase a special bike in order to get around town with your kids and stuff!  If I had decided against the Fr8, I could have made my current bike setup work better for me.  But since we were getting rid of a car, it made sense for us to upgrade to a much nicer bike.

Little, loving his pink bike

 We also have a balance bike used by both Bigger and Little, a pink Strider.  We like that the Strider is lightweight and relatively sturdy, and that it's small enough to hold a very little passenger (both boys started on it at age two).  I would say that I feel that many of these balance bikes are a little overpriced given the quality of the product, and that it is simple to remove the pedals from a 12" kids' bike from the Goodwill for a total cost of $10 or less.  (Our neighbors transformed a 12" Salvation Army cast off into a truly awesome, custom painted balance bike that I hope to feature here sometime.)

Why we choose to ride bikes together:

As Heather pointed out last week, there are too many reasons to share all of them here!

Our decision to give up a car was tied into our beliefs about what is practical, sensible, and fair.  I think that people on bikes, foot, and public transit (and the infrastructure that supports these modes of transport) make our communities richer, more equitable, and pleasant places to live.  I believe that getting around by bike is helping my children to grow up more confident, resilient, and fit.  I think that it will help them to be more independent as they grow older and begin to be able to get around town on their own.  It almost always lifts our mood to get out by bike.  And getting rid of a car helps to free up money in our budget for other things that are more important to us.

What kinds of trips to we make by bike?  And what other modes of transport do we commonly use?

I make almost every trip by bike, by foot, or bus now.  We do our shopping, appointments, playdates, and most other trips by bike.  I ride the bus to my teaching job. We walk to various destinations close to home (the park, the bakery, etc.) regularly as well.  I've started to frequent shops within four miles of our house almost exclusively.  I've become more efficient in the way I run errands.  And because we really enjoy riding our bikes, taking the bus, and walking, I'm more likely to plan a couple of pleasant errand and park trips every other day or so.  When I was driving my kids around, I often crammed several hours of errands into one day in order to avoid the unpleasantness of errands by car as much as possible.

We also love taking long-distance trips by train.  Our most frequent trip by train is to visit my parents' house near McMinnville.  I have taken my two kids on several overnight train trips by myself, which is actually really fun provided that you have the good sense not to let your kids drink the complimentary sparking juice right before bedtime.

Austin carpools to his job as a carpenter each day.  He sometimes has to make trips of up to 50 miles with large loads of lumber and tools, so I think that this is a pretty sensible option for him.  The final few car trips I make a month (between 0 and 3, typically) typically involve and social obligations in distant areas at times when there is no bus service (or very limited bus service).  The moms at Carfree with Kids have a great post about this which is helping me think about how to collaborate with friends and family so that visiting is more convenient for all of us.  One of the goals I have for this year is to try to get to rural family members' homes at least a couple of times a month by bus.  I'm hoping that this will help us refine our rural bus trip routine so that it's more automatic for us to visit our rural family members this way.  Plus, if we're getting to folks' houses by bus regularly, they'll understand if we can't make it to some of those late weekend events.  Not to mention the fact that my kids are always asking for more bus trips!  At $3 for a day pass (the kids are too young to pay fare) it's a cheap thrill.

A bike tip for other beginning family bicyclists:

See if there are Kidical Mass rides where you live.  Meeting and talking with folks at Kidical Mass helped me build confidence about riding my bike with my children when I was just getting started.  I learned some family-friendly, low traffic routes to my favorite destinations.  I've gotten advice about family bike setups, and seen some really interesting family bikes in action.  And I've met a community of people who enjoy riding bikes with their kids.  There's a Kidical Mass in Eugene tomorrow -- meet us at 3 pm in Monroe Park!

Butterflies and Balloons: First Bus Commute to My New Job

Last week I started a new, very part time teaching job teaching writing classes at a small rural elementary school.  When I taught here a few years ago, I drove.  Even with something interesting on the radio, and beautiful scenery on the way, it was a kind of a dull commute.  I remember thinking that I would have rather been doing almost anything else while I had childcare for Bigger (who was only a year old at the time) than feeling stuck in my car.

As I was planning my first bus commute last week, I was curious about how the trip would turn out.  Would it still feel like I was squandering those precious minutes of childcare?  I was also concerned about the cargo I was planning to bring: 14 helium-filled balloons along with a heavy bag.  Would it be too awkward to carry these things on the bus?  Would the bus commute hamper my creativity as a teacher by limiting what I could bring to school with me?

As it turned out, I was too nervous to really enjoy my commute there, or to notice much about it.  Most teachers get a case of butterflies in the stomach on the first day of school.  For me on this particular first day, those first day jitters were pretty intense, since it's been two years since I last taught in a classroom.  Witness my self-portrait on the bus ride there, below:

You probably can't tell that I'm trying to smile.  My crazy hair isn't helping, either.  Okay, here's shot number two, trying harder.

Not really much more genuine, right?  I just gave up after that.

Aside from my nerves, though, the morning bus ride was just fine.  It was no problem to bring the balloons with me, and in fact, no one even mentioned them during my trip.  My bags were not all that heavy.  I made it to the school about ten minutes earlier than I had expected to, giving me some extra time to catch up with the school's office manager (an incredible woman, I think that school secretaries should run the world) and catch my breath before setting up for my lessons and collecting students.

And the students?  They are wonderful!  I already love them.  We used the balloons as a prop for our first lesson, about finding inspiration for writing in ordinary life.  Then each child composed something very short, taped it to a balloon, cut the ribbon, and let it fly away.  I wish I could post the photos here! 

After I finished teaching, I had some time at school to do some prep work for my next lesson and help out a little in the classroom of a friend from grad school.  I arrived at the bus stop with plenty of time to read before my bus arrived.  Reading for pleasure in the middle of the day?  That's this busy mother's definition of heaven.

 

On the bus, I had a chance to do some knitting.  I have this beautiful ivory baby alpaca yarn that I've been trying to make a cowl from since my birthday in October.  I've ripped it out several times because the width of the cowl or the type of stitch I chose just didn't feel right.  It was good to finally make some progress on it.

The bus was fairly quiet and mellow.  It was raining, and there were beautiful birds and trees outside.  A mother boarded the bus with her daughter, and they read a children's novel aloud in soft voices.  An older man asked me what I was knitting.  It was a pleasant trip.

So far, I really like my bus commute.  It's nice to have my hands and my mind free, and to be able to focus on whatever relaxing activity (or, um, gripping anxiety) I've brought with me.  I'm looking forward to my commute again this week.  And in the new year, I'm excited to try cycling some or all of it.  For you seasoned rural cyclists, biking 16 miles on country roads must be no big deal.  To me, though, it is a whole new world.  What better way, though, to practice what I preach as a teacher?  Children need to know that adults are sometimes beginners, too.

A Little Bit of Everything

On Monday, Bigger's teachers informed me that he had spent the afternoon giddily polling his fellow preschoolers.  His question? "What's your favorite way to get around?"  He likes to ask me this one, too.  My favorite modes of transport are no secret (bikes, buses, trains, and walking), but he pretends each time that he is surprised to hear my reply.  "Really?  Me too, Mama!"

I really wonder how the other children responded to his question.  I don't see any of them arrive at school, but I do see many of them leave with their parents at the end of the day.  Almost all of them are picked up in a car.  (The one exception is a little friend of ours, who I believe arrives most mornings on foot or on his balance bike.)  Do these kids love bikes, or walks?  Do they ever go places on the bus?  Bigger refused to share the results of his survey!  I guess he didn't want me to scoop him on his big story.  Oh, well.

Anyhow, yesterday we managed to use (or connect with someone who had just used) all our favorite modes of transportation.  First, we walked to the park with our friend A.  She rode her balance bike -- a 12" bike with the pedals removed.  Little, Bigger, and I walked.

She was much, much faster than us.  Those balance biking kids can really get up some speed!  Bigger had decided to leave his balance bike at home. I didn't get any shots of us walkers -- we were too busy trying to catch up with A., and making sure that she stopped at alleys and iffy driveways.

Then we ran an errand on our family bike.  No photos of that either, but here's one of us from another day, on our crazy interim bike -- a new one is coming in March!

Photo by our neighbor, B

Finally, we took the bus to go pick up my mom (the kids call her "Mimi") at the Amtrak train station.  This was absolutely the highlight of our day.  Trains!  Mimi!  Bus rides!

My mom struggles with chronic pain, and driving her car for two hours to visit her grandkids is usually very painful for her.  Over Thanksgiving, she decided to try taking the train down to visit us instead.  Since she can get up, walk around, or recline her seat if she needs to, the train seemed like a good option for her.  She reported that her trip was pretty comfortable and relaxing.  And then her grandson handled the luggage on our bus ride home.

The bus ride was so relaxing.  I love it when someone else does the driving.  Little enjoyed the bus so much that he wailed and screamed that he wanted to get back on the bus for at least a block of our walk.  Hello, neighbors!  I hope you like kids!

Me (with some really excellent hat hair) and Little on our favorite seats

All in all, it was a lovely way to start our visit with my mom.  There was nothing too special about it, it was just another pleasant day getting around our little town.

Over the river and through the woods...

...to Grandmother's house we went.  This afternoon we took the bus to Creswell to visit Grandma M.  The boys love buses almost as much as they love Grandma, so there was plenty of excitement in the air while we waited to catch the bus to the downtown (Eugene) station.

Today the weather forecast included the possibility of snow, so you might think we were feeling the chill as we walked to, and then waited at the bus stop.  Actually, with only minimal forethought, we were quite warm, even when the wind picked up a bit.

The boys wore their standard cold weather uniforms: soft woolen caps, sturdy pants with silk or capilene long underwear, soft woolen socks, Bogs boots, and rain coats with either a thick fleece or wool layer underneath.  (Mittens are also a part of this set-up, but they were removed in these photos for snacking.)  We probably spend a little more on cold-weather clothing than most families in our income range, but we spend a lot less on mass-produced plastic toys, movies, etc.  We consider an investment in cold-weather clothing as the cost of year-round access to the outdoors, which is the most stimulating and fun "toy" imaginable.  Plus, we get at least four years out of each item of clothing, since Bigger passes things on to Little in good time.  Our team of grandparents supplies some of these items each year for birthday and holiday gifts, which we very much appreciate.

There's little photographic evidence, but I wore my standard cold weather uniform: soft wool tights (sweater tights from Sock Dreams in Portland today), an extra pair of wool knee socks, tall boots, a simple dress, a cardigan, and a hooded wool coat.  I'm still getting the hang of taking my own photo, so you'll have to use your imagination.

While waiting at the bus stop, we find it best to have...

...a snack.  Little in particular seems to be eating nonstop these days.  We also always bring...

...an imaginary border for our kingdom.  Beyond that crack in the sidewalk lies a perilous no mans' land (and a busy street).

We typically pack at least one book for bus trips.  Our current favorite is a selection of stories by Margaret Wise Brown that Ritta got for the boys.  (Thanks, Ritta!)  It hits the ultimate traveling book sweet spot: compact size, sturdy binding, excellent literary quality, and it's an anthology (meaning lots of stories are available for long trips).  What more could you ask?

Of course, we also bring correct change for the bus (though these boys are young enough to ride free), and aim to arrive a few minutes early.

Today we did not need our book, as the boys were enthralled with the bus and its inhabitants.  On the ride downtown, our bus was packed.  We sat at the back, where the seats are elevated, and talked about our plans for the evening and all the things we saw out the window.  The bus was a little late, so we had to rush to make our connection to Creswell.  I think that next time I will give myself more time to transfer.

Creswell is a small town about half an hour from downtown Eugene, by car or bus.  During our ride there, freezing rain dropped in fat circles on the window.  Bigger and I chatted while Little dozed for a minute or two.  People were knitting, reading, and fiddling with their cell phones (though no one was talking on one, thankfully).  It was a pleasant and cozy ride, and I was glad that someone else was driving through this weather so that I could relax.  We arrived 35 minutes after leaving the station, and met Grandma M. at the stop.  When we walked into her place, there was a fire in the wood stove, and dinner waiting for us in the oven.  Is that a tired mother's fantasy, or what?

Little dazzled the company at dinner with the sequel to this bus stop dance.

One of the goals I have for this winter is to take the bus to Creswell more often, in part because I hope that transit service to this part of Lane County will be improved.  On the weekends (when we most often go there), there are only two (on Sunday) or three (on Saturday) bus trips there per day.  Not only is Grandma M. a big attraction in Creswell, it now has a year round Tuesday farmer's market and Heidi Tunnell's Tuesday bakery, Wednesday dinners, and winemaker barn dinners.  I would love to see more frequent bus service to Creswell so that we could get to these events more easily by bus. 

But for now, the times that we do bus down there are hundred times more interesting and enjoyable than a drive would be.